after a long time...

wooow!!! awfully long time!!! actually i have alot to blog but then i guess not at this time, sort off sleepy so yeah.. I wanna go get a good nap!! fuyooooh!! not bad at all my update!!

LOL!! I'm just being plain stupid!! Anyways will update it real soon!!! Real real soon!! Promise!! I lost count how many times i promised Fred this, everytime that poor soul asks "hey bro you update your blog not...?" and I'd confidently go, "tonight I confirm will update bro...promise!!!". LOL!!!

For you Fred!!! I will update tomorrow I promise!!! XD...

Fred and myself XD..

gahh....

Haizz....such crap man life has at times :-(. Frankly I don't think I have the strength to even describe what happened vividly.... Its just so messed up. I wonder why at times it has to be me but, again coming to think of it there are more people much more messed up than I am, so yea I just shove it up my head and move on :-).

I went to KL the day before, about 1.30 am. I just felt a sudden sense of loneliness and i really don't know why on earth I chose the heart of Malaysia to go for a ride. Either way i just shot of to KL and yes, the very minute i reached KL, my emotions had a complete 180 degree change....I really wish i had a proper reason for it but this is one of the times where you just can't comprehend why you feel that way. The lights of KL made me ponder alot....it made me somehow dive inside myself and it really stirred alot of emotions. It made me feel very very lonely.

It made me feel that I really have nobody but myself. It was just me alone against this monstrous concrete jungle I'd say. Honestly, what did I do wrong? I did nothing. I was just lonely...but why is it I have to think sooooo much?? I hate it...I loathe it! But then again, I missed it all.....I remember how I insecure I used to be and the lights of KL brought me down that lane again... I just stared at the city and thought to myself that this ride would have been the sweetest thing if I had someone that I could love whole-heartedly.

Picture this....you and the girl you love\adore the most in the world, you both having a ride down KL streets at night, sharing stories, exchanging opinions and cracking jokes laughing to your hearts content, and you look into her eye....she's the sweetest thing you'd ever possibly imagine :-). The lights of KLCC really blew me off into my imaginary world. At KLCC, you and her, snapping pictures, turning on a music, dancing with grace.....under the starry night. It sends a message to the world, "both of us are imperfect but our love isn't. She is everything in the world to me.." Trust me that rush is beyond what a dose of adrenaline could possibly give :-).

I really hope someday I'd be fortunate to make it happen....till then I guess the lights of KL in the dark nights would be my greatest company of my imagination. :-)....

....:-)....

I don't know why....I am here out for breakfast and I know this loneliness is setting into me. :-).... Its been quite awhile since I've had the capability to feel this sort off loneliness. I try denying the fact of it but yeah it is something I really cant. :-).... I guess everyone will feel the lost and loneliness if the sun is setting on the other side of their world. Mine isnt any different....I suppose I'm gonna miss the warmth and comfort the sun has brought for a short period of time. :-)....I'm gonna miss it alot....:-)

....i miss u....

gahh....the same 3 words we use sometimes not knowing the impact of it. It is a very easy thing using those words, frankly I feel it is this three words that bring about more impact in comparison of words like "i love you" and whatsoever.... I'm not going to brag on about it but it is really all simple....when you actually say "i miss you", do you really know what it means??

It is really all simple. When you miss that particular person, your just craving for that person's personal attention and companionship. All you really want is some good time to have an heart-to-heart conversation, gazing at the particular person's eyes and letting your mind wonder about how amazing he\she is....

Deep down when you hear the ticking of the time your heart goes frantically fearful....because you know time is ahead and that moment is going to meet its end, something you wish that would last for a lifetime perhaps. When you both take your ways, deep down your heart cries out in happiness soooo much you just wanna jump and scream to the whole world!! You look at him\her and you just wonder "are you feeling what i am?".... In despite of that unanswered question, you just head home with so much happiness and gratefulness to God for creating a little heaven on earth for you....you lie down on your bed....

Tears some time just roll down, in your head the entire moment hasnt quite come to an end, you crave for it to somehow magically happen so that her\his voice and presence would always be your shadow.....you turn to your right,your left and you walk around your house....

You grab your handphone so tight and you die to yourself every second waiting or wanting to text......but you just cant seem to do it....

That is when you know your missing that particular person.....you just miss him\her....

I really dont know how it makes sense but at the very least it does to me...:-)

21/09/2010....awesome..

21st/09/2010....lolz!! one hecka day of my life! :D....I never knew i'd have that much fun...it was my 1st experience and its a memorable one...a beautiful thing :-).

So yea, it started with english class which by the way....draggy and even 24 hours of complete sleep would never be sufficient for you to stay awake. Somehow she has the art off singing lullabies to put us to bed. Anyways, it was test and i went late thanks to Subang's awesomeness in lacj of parking spots but on this day I can't express how this turned my wwhole day around. Irony....total irony :-D. One minute I was cursing my heart out because I had to look for parking and 2 hours later I could'nt be any more thankful  than i was....

Well I met up with her after such a freaking long time, such a freaking long time....hahahahahaha and I really missed her, alot! We yacked alot at Snowflakes, trust me dessert never tasted better! LOL!!!

Alot of stories, plenty of stories we shared with each other. Talk and talk and talk....had some real good laughs till.... "kabaaammmm"!!! Lightning!!!! Thunder!!!!! I'm a chicken when it comes to lightning and here is the best part....my car was parked miles away. Hahahahaha.....off all days she did not bring her umbrella and I had to park my car that far!

So yea after all that freaking out of the lightning and thunder.....we decided to cross the road and head in INTI, and we got dreched but nothing like wat happened next... As we approached the bench, that poor girl....her sandal tore!! Hahahahaha....honestly I felt really really bad for her and the rain began to get heavier, so we decided to just have a seat first whilst waiting for the rain to chill down.

To cut the whole thing short....she decided to walk with me to the car but she had to remove her sandals and I joined her! We took off our footwear and started walking under the freaking heavy rain!!! LOL!!! At the entrance of INTI we got a heart attack!! A whole bunch of students......lol!! But what the heck right?!! Who gave a damn?!!! Hahahahahahahahhaha.....it was a long and a worth while walk.... We spoke alot of things and we had alot of laughs....like some crazy people getting drenched under the cool showers of rain with tar poking through our feets :D.

It was really an awesome and beautiful experience and to share it with an awesome character was especially amazing. :D.....it will always remain as one of the most beautiful moments in my life and an unforgettable chapter...:-). The rain was good.... :-)....the meeting up was good.... The day couldnt have got any better...:-)

Something that I will treasure and a moment that i'll appreciate forever :-)

wahhhh!!!!!!

wahhhh!!!! hahahaha..lolz!!!! such a long time since i updated or has it?? owhh well...either way lately it has been friggin stressfull...alot of things taking place and stupid Mumbai Indians arent making it any easier on me!!! Out afta 20 runs??? Thats not the Tendulkar i know!!!!!

Either way....been missing this particular person alot lately, it has been sometime since I saw her or hanged out with her :-D...lol! I'm blabbering....owhh well let just time take its course...

ASSignments are killing!!!!! Presentations? Portfolio?? Journals???  Dear Lord.....what thou have in mind for me?? lol....either way I just gotta cruise these things because its wat that makes life worth it :-)...

.....raindrops...

It was a cold evening....and I forced my mum to take me for a hot cup of hazelnut coffee at Old Town...ahhh!!! What an awesome way to enjoy the beautiful rain....:-).. driving home after that made me ponder...

At the driver seat...I stopped at the red light. Turned to my right and I observed the reflections of my interior L.E.D lights on the mirror...and I couldnt help myself but to notice the raindrops trickling down the mirror.... Not sure how this emotion should be described but....the cool air that awakened all my cold sensory,it sliced through my lungs every single time I took a breath...

Imagine if you had this special person in your life...and its a cold weather,all you'd want is warmth... A warm cuddle and a sense of security as she\he holds you around their arms... You know your in safe arms and that sense of love is beyond explanation.

It may sound silly but to me, rain brings insecurity, it brings this feeling where your entire emotion and physical cries out for warmth....it gets you lost,unsure,cold and lonely :-).

:-).....inside every guy there is this desire..to be in the arms of the girl they love the most because its in this day we feel insecure,exposed and lost...I am no exception and thanks to the beautiful rain drops I recollected this particular emotion....:-)

Sunset.....

been sometime....hahahaha..seriously i've got alot to work on this blogging thing but I guess i really need some time...:-). leaving that aside...today's sunset was awesome....i even got a few shots of it but I lazy wanna upload...it somehow reminded me and stirred up a certain desire and emotions up:-)..

I remember how was it wen I saw the 1st sunset in my life....years ago....it was probably one of the most beautiful thing I've ever come across. The sun somehow symbolizes passion,rage,superiority and power but to me....it means love... I know its stupid and probably very lame but imagine this... your at a beach and the sun is gracefully setting...the lips of the waves gently brushes ur toes....and beside you is this most amazing girl....she's sitting right beside you and you both are gazing at the sunset....the sea breeze and the warmth... Its that awesome moment...

Some of us had the chance and some just have yet but its this little things that spark love....deep down every one of us we want that moment, even I am no different...I loathe the fact that the geography of my house is such that I watch the sunset every single day because in my heart I want to admire its beauty with an angel beside me...

I know I'll hav my time but to sit n wait 4 every second ticking by....in many ways it pinches the need in my heart but i know all I have do is nothing but wait...:-)

Finally!!!!

for the 1st time!!! lolz!! thanks 2 Fred...he made me 2 sign up for blogging jz so dat i cud b his follower...lolz! so yea.....well as for 2day its my first post.... i'll try and learn and do a betta post a step at a time...